IF I AM BEREAVED / GENESIS 43:14

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(KJV) Genesis 43:14

And God Almighty give you mercy before the man, that he may send away your other brother, and Benjamin. If I be bereaved of my children, I am bereaved.

The Power of Surrender: Finding Peace When You Can’t Change the Outcome

We have all faced moments when the walls feel like they are closing in, and every choice before us carries the risk of heartbreak. In Genesis 43:14, we find the patriarch Jacob (Israel) backed into a desperate corner. A severe famine is ravaging the land, one of his sons is being held captive in Egypt, and the only way to secure food—and save his family from starvation—is to send away Benjamin, his youngest and most fiercely protected child.

For a long time, Jacob resisted. He wrestled with his past traumas and tried to control the situation. But when he finally saw that there was absolutely nothing he could do to alter his terrible circumstances, he stopped running in circles. He uttered a prayer that stands as one of the most raw, honest expressions of faith in Scripture:

“And may God Almighty grant you mercy before the man… As for me, if I am bereaved, I am bereaved.”

— Genesis 43:14

Moving from Control to El Shaddai

When Jacob cries out, he addresses God as El Shaddai—God Almighty. This wasn’t just a generic title. It was a deliberate invocation of the all-powerful, covenant-keeping God who had guided his grandfather Abraham and his father Isaac.

By calling on El Shaddai, Jacob shifted his gaze away from “the man” in Egypt (who was actually his long-lost son Joseph, though he didn’t know it yet) and focused on the ultimate sovereignty of God. He realized that while human rulers and harsh realities can threaten us, divine strength ultimately prevails.

The Freedom of “So Be It”

The phrase “If I am bereaved, I am bereaved” can easily sound like pure pessimism or hopeless resignation at first glance. But in reality, it marks a profound spiritual turning point. It was the moment Jacob gave up the illusion of control and willingly accepted God’s will, even if it meant facing loss and suffering.

Like Jesus praying in the Garden of Gethsemane—“Not my will, but yours be done”—Jacob reached a place of complete surrender. He took every sensible, practical step he could (sending gifts and double the silver) and then left the final outcome entirely in the hands of a merciful God.

There is an incredible, unexplainable freedom that comes when we adopt this same heart posture. When we stop trying to force doors open or micromanage our futures, the paralyzing anxiety breaks.

The God of Unexpected Joy

Jacob surrendered his sons expecting the worst, preparing his heart for deeper grief. But God’s plans were infinitely better than Jacob’s fears.

Not only did Benjamin and Simeon return safely, but Jacob was reunited with Joseph—the son he had mourned for decades. As things turned out, Jacob didn’t spend his final years in isolation and sorrow. Instead, he was able to spend the rest of his life celebrating the goodness, abundance, and faithfulness of the One who had carefully guided him through every twist and turn of his journey.

If you are facing an uncertain situation today that is triggering your deepest fears, take heart. Do what you can, lay down the weight of what you can’t, and trust your future to El Shaddai.

A Closing Prayer

Almighty Father,
We come before You today acknowledging that we cannot control the storms, the famines, or the uncertain roads ahead of us. Forgive us for the times we try to hold on so tightly to our lives that we choke out our own peace.

Today, we lay our greatest, most crippling fears at Your feet of mercy. We step out into the unknown, choosing to put our hands firmly in Yours. Give us the courage to say, “Your will be done,” knowing that even if Your path includes seasons of suffering, Your ultimate plan is for our good and Your glory. Thank You for being the faithful Guide who never leaves our side.

In Jesus’ name,
Amen.

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